Sunday, August 15, 2010

Our post-testosterone haze

So, a few weeks ago, slug boy, aka Kieran, turned 16. And for quite a while now, he'd been pestering us about his birthday party. Making plans. Reminding me ad nauseum that twiggy sticks were essential. Increasing the amount of guests (aka other slug boys) that he wanted to stay over. And last night, the x-box extravaganza took place. Slugs started slithering from their parental vehicles at about 4, and by 6, the house was over-run with testosterone. I was reminded why I'm glad that I teach at a co-ed school - 10 of them was bad enough, but a whole class of them??? Ugggh.

The big tv from the lounge room was moved to the back room, so they could system link the two tvs and xboxs and battle each other. Dennis was stuck with a little 34cm tv in the lounge room - it looks rediculous in our big unit! lol They were all glued to the tvs until dinner, aka plates full of meat and potatoes, was served, at which point they awoke from their previously catatonic state and went outside to eat. Then promptly started stick fighting with stumps, cricket bats and broom sticks. Note to self - next time, get parental units to sign an indemnity form.

Luckily, they all survived, then went back to the xboxes, after a quick detour for mud cake topped with proffiteroles with pretty sparkly candles. The girls and I headed out for a night at the movies - if you haven't been to half pipe, the bean bag cinema, you really need to try it! At Hoyts Mt Druitt - not sure if they have them in other places as well, and it was fun. Tayla, of course, had to practise somersaulting from one to the next - luckily the cinema wasn't very full! lol

I got home fully expecting to see the boys all still glued to the screens. You can imagine my surprise when I discovered them old school gaming. With dice, and a board. Yep, all crowded in the lounge room playing board games. I was shocked. Apparently they were lured from the back of the house by Angelina Jolie on the tv (entirely understandable!!!) and then felt the need to play a WW2 recreation game. Yep, Kieran's friends are obviously as big military nuts as he is .... sigh.

Dennis and I went to bed at about 1am, and awoke this morning to discover that 3 of the slug boys had not slept at all ... they gamed through the night. 2 of those have already gone home - they just couldn't cope, I guess, and were probably asleep before their cars hit the end of the street. I spent an hour this morning cooking bacon and hash browns, and they are shooting at each other again. Not sure what time they are all leaving, but I hope it's soon - I need a nanna nap!

So, the toll for the evening?
1.5 kg twiggy sticks
2 kg sausages
2 kg chicken kebabs
2 kg potato bake
2 kg popcorn chicken
10 bags of lollies and chips
5 boxes of softdrink (they were attempting to build an empty can pyramid - the crash at 3am indicated they were not too successful at that venture)
2 kg bacon
2 bags hash browns

Luckily, they didn't want to appear too greedy, so not many of them touched the salad I'd so carefully prepared. Apparently, whilst green is great on camoflauge gear, it's not so popular on your dinner plate. Who knew??

Whilst I complained on facebook during the night about the crashes, smells and other assorted noises in my house, I will say this .... we've done a good job with this boy. Whilst I was out shopping for his party food yesterday, he was tidying the house. At random moments throughout the night and morning, he's come up to me to give me a hug and say thanks, and that he loves me. His friends are polite, responsible, and a really great group of people, and it's been no trouble at all having them here. (I can say that because I'm fairly certain that none of them read my blog - wouldn't say it to their faces though, they might keep coming back!! lol) So, while I sit here inhaling my 2nd coffee for the morning, and listen to them abusing each other ("stop shooting me!!!!!"), I'm reminded how blessed I am. It's been a rough few years with this boy, but even at our worst, I know that it could have been way more horrendous, and I know that, compared to what others have faced, and are facing with their teens, we've got it easy. In fact, compared to what we went through first time round, this is a cake walk. I'm proud of the young man he's turning into, and I'm proud of how we as a couple, and as a family, are dealing with it. Go us!!

Was planning on adding some photos, but can't find the card reader - I suspect it's in Kieran's room, and I'm wary of venturing out there at the moment. Contemplating having a shower, then another coffee, perhaps followed by some rollerskating this afternoon? Not sure if my body is up to it, but it could be fun!

Take care everyone - have a great sunday!

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

A long time between drinks.

Almost a year, in fact, since I posted on here. And what a year it's been. I've been going through a lot .... WE'VE been going through a lot. As a couple, as parents, as an extended family, it's been emotional, and exhausting, and scary, and amazing .... it's been full of a lot, and I can't begin to find the words to express it all here. I will say this though .... I'm so very grateful that I have so many wonderful people around me. I'm so very grateful for the man I get to call mine every day. I'm so very grateful for these children who I probably don't deserve, but who still call me mum anyway, and who love me in spite of all my hangups about myself. I'm so very grateful for these crazy beautiful wonderful women that I call my friends. And I'm so grateful for the gift of a wonderful woman who I don't know very well, but who has been an enormous help to me, and is still helping me work through all this baggage that I've been hanging on to for such a very long time.

So, I'm blogging again .... for no other reason that, as part of some much needed therapy, I've started writing. And I forgot how much I missed it. And, I've been reading some blogs, and I've been moved. Inspired by the lives of some wonderful women who are struggling with the ordinariness of womanhood. Enchanted by the strength that they have shown in embracing that ordinariness, and celebrating the amazing worth that is them. So I decided it was time to get back to blogging. I've spent the past hour or so reading over my old posts, with tears streaming down my face, as I relived some wonderful moments. As I remembered the pain of loss, and the stinging tears that accompanied my last meal of eggs and soldiers. I'm so glad this blog lurks here, holding these reflections for me, and I don't want to forget them.

There has been a lot going on over the past few months, and I'm still really overwhelmed with it all. Lots of elephants, big and small, lurking in the corners of my livingroom. What are the elephants? They're my baggage, both spoken and unspoken, and I've spent a lot of time ignoring a lot of them, but it's been getting harder and harder lately, and to be honest, I don't think that's a bad thing. I mentioned blogs I've been reading .... the most powerful, and the most profound for me, is Tracey Clark's collection of reflections on Enoughness .... I Am Enough. Such beautiful women. Such real stories. And each time I read one, I'm struck by how similar in so many ways they are, or were, to me. I'm really sick, in this elephant-ridden room, of feeling like I'm not enough, so I'm taking hold of the promise of me, and giving myself a break. My dead people would be pissed at me for giving myself such a hard time. I'm pissed at myself for giving myself such a hard time. And if I know nothing else about that awesome man I call a husband, I know that HE'S pissed at me for giving myself such a hard time! So I'm trying to be nicer to this girl who is me, and I'm hoping that she gets better at accepting that. Am I Enough? Right now I'm not 100% believing of that, but I'm getting closer!

Wow, that's a deep one for my return to the blogosphere huh? I guess I'll be around more often, as I get back into the swing of this writing thing .... I'd forgotten how much it helps me clarify my thoughts when I purge those thoughts from my crowded head. Even if no-one is still reading this, I will be .... so thanks for reading, me, and I'll talk to you again soon!